Great TV

Everest: Beyond the Limit is back on Discovery channel. What a great show. Full of a bunch of retards who paid to climb Mt. Everest. So far we have two dude who didn't even come close last year and a woman who apparently has no mountaineering skills. All paying an army of sherpas to cook for them, carry all their shit (figuratively and probably literally) so they can have their bodies and brains deteriorate from the high altitude as they attempt to walk up Everest. The thing that strikes you most is how the American "climbers"/clients come off as such douchebags when compared to the mild Aussies and Kiwis. They don't listen and they pretend to know everything as move toward impending death. You find yourself rooting for their failure.

Top __ Lists

Top 8 things I miss about my childhood

1. Saturday morning cartoons while eating overflowing bowls of Cap'n Crunch.
2. collecting baseball cards
3. cupball (baseball, but we used crushed paper cups and hit with our hands)
4. Mr. Wizard
5. climbing the tree in my grandparents' backyard and pretending that it was Airwolf
6. swimming for hours on end until I was wrinkly
7. trick-or-treating
8. ______ tag (freeze, TV, movie, etc.)

Top 8 things that replaced the things on the previous list

1. Saturday morning soccer with English breakfast (and maybe a pint)
2. collecting wine
3. soccer
4. Simpsons
5. hiking around Pasadena and pretending that its the wilderness
6. drinking for hours on end until my liver is wrinkly
7. drinking Pete and Lauri's beers
8. ???

Top 5 things that I am forced to do as an adult that completely ruined all my childhood images of being an adult

1. job
2. bills
3. other people being retarded
4. responsibility
5. the slow decay of my memory

Harry Potter Issues

I don't read the Harry Potter books, but I've seen all the movie's, (Isay most of the latest one on the plane home from Chicago) so I have some issues maybe you Potterphiles can answer.

1. Why is the bad guy always the defense against the dark arts teacher? Why can't Hogwarts better it's screening process? When Harry's class graduates from Hogwarts, they will have had no training against the dark arts because all their teachers have been Voldemort's minions? If Mad Eye Moody was Voldemort or his minion (i forget) why was he so nice to Neville Longbottom?

2. Where was the Tri Wizard tournament in the fist book? Every book seems to introduce some previously unknown element to the magical universe that make everything before it seem kind of silly. In Goblet of Fire, its indicated that every 3 years the Tri Wizard tournament is held , but that would mean that it wouldv'e been going on during Sorcerer's Stone, but you didn't hear anything about it? Then there is the train to Hogwarts, which got replaced by Flu Powder, which got replaced by Port Keys. I realize we can't expect the author to stick completely to the constraints she set up in the first book, but it makes everything feel a bit inconsistent.

3. Why does Harry end up going back the the Dursely's every year. Doesn't anyone have a couch the kid can flop on for the summer? What happened to the Weasely's pad? Did they send him packing or what?

Insomnia

Help me I can't sleep. I feel like Ed Norton in the beginning of Fight Club.

I May be Losing my soul...

I was going to do this as a list. Y'know top 10 reasons I think I'm losing my soul. But I wanted to break away from the list format and give a little exposition. Well here it is... I think I may be losing my soul for the following reasons. I now travel for business. I can give you travel tips. I can tell you a good place to get a steak if you ever find yourself in downtown St. Louis. I can't tell you where to find a cool local hangout, but if you ever want to take a trip to the top of the St. Louis arch, I'm your man. I think I might be losing my soul because on return from my last business trip I had an Action Items List. I went to a software conference for Christ's sake...who among you can claim that one. I think I might be losing my soul because I, on a regular basis, use the term "revenue streams". I have on two occasions this year signed a document entitled "Individual Performance Objectives". I think I may be losing my soul because on Nov. 1st. I have to attend a Microsoft Outlook Class (and it's the advance class). I think I may be losing my soul because I completely lose all control of my mind and any usefulness after 10pm on a weekday. I don't really read anymore, because any time I try to read, I start to think about work.
Thats enough. I didn't used to have to take take my job so seriously. I have a boss that really buys into this shit and frankly I'm getting raises like there is no tommorow, but I don't know ...is it worth feeling like a douchebag a lot of the time? Any suggestions?

Just wanted to say

You all were right. Everyone of you. I never should have moved here. I regret it every day that goes by.
I just wanted to say that. I also wanted to apologize to my firends down there for leaving you. I am outta here as soon as possible. I look forward to seeing you all next year sometime.
Sorry everyone I was wrong you were right.

Randy

How do you say Bored in AK?

1. I've come to realize the last person who held my hand...was a really long time ago
2. I am listening to..."Band of Horses" new album
3. I speak...english
4. I am dating...no one
5. My best friend(s)...are probably doing some thing fun anywhere but Alaska
6. My car...is no more
7. I hate it when people ask...What time is it? Time for you to get a watch it would seem
8. Love...is an elusive creature
9. Marriage is...not in my near future
10. Somewhere, someone is thinking...Whatever happened to that Randy Moe character?
11. I'm always...drinking
12. I have a secret crush...On someone. If I told you it wouldn't be secret anymore.
13. My cell phone...Is in front of me but not working. Sorry. I live in the backwoods.
14. When I woke up this morning...I wished I was in California
15. Before I go to bed at night...I think about life and stuff
16. Right now I am thinking about...the answers for this survey
17. Babies are...small and smell bad a lot
18. I get on MySpace...Cause I have nothing better to do
19. Today I...ordered some stuff from Amazon and am filling this out now. Riveting, I know.
20. Tonight I will...Hopefully not sit at home but realistically I will
21. Tomorrow I will...Go to Church against my will and then watch football the rest of the day and drink till I fall asleep.
22. I really want...a million dollars in California

BTW the answer was: Fill out a stupid survey you found on MySpace.

Updated Slideshow

See the updated slideshow below for some pics of our trip back east. Tom has all the pics from the wedding.

Top 5 Happy Hour snacks (in order)

1. Wings
2. Nachos
3. Skins
4. Cheese fries
5. chips n' salsa n' guacamole

Clearly, wings are the best. Please advise.

Floating Between Infinities

We're on a canoe, me Tom and Lauri. It's 11pm, there is no moon and the milky way is banding across the sky and refelcting on the water. If we stop paddling and float, we can't tell where the sky ends and the water begins. I know that sounds a little Forest Gump, but it felt as we were floating between two infinities. I'm not sure it gets any better than that.

Jincha

Have you ever wondered what your name would be if you were a Brazilian soccer player? Well, check out this website too find out. I'm Jincha.

Bob Dylan = Dylando
George Bush = Georgildo
William Jennings Bryan = William Jennio
Charles Grodin = Groda
Barack Obama = Obamiano
Chuck Norris = Chimo
Pol Pot = Perto
Robot Chicken = Chickaca
Try to guess: Luka, Vadino, Obi Wisco, Pinhosa, Finhosa

Top 5 wines that I am looking forward to drinking soon

1. 1999 Domaine Alfred Califa Pinot Noir
2. 2005 Domaine Carneros Estate Pinot Noir
3. 2005 Kynsi Pinot Blanc
4. 2004 Maloy O'Neill Enzo (blend)
5. Pete's 1980-something Bordeaux (its about time to open that sucker up Pete - find a special occasion)

If you want to see all of the bottles that I am currently holding check out my list at corkd.com

See if you can spot these quotes

As election season approaches, you should remember this little piece of wisdom...

"You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you!"

In your various love lives out there you should remember this bit of wisdom...
"There's a million of FINE lookin' women in this world, but they don't all bring you lasagna at work...most of them just cheat on ya."

Variance on a theme (my first post here)

Most of you have checked out my regular blog and noticed how I have gone to the list format. I will be now bringing a barrage of lists to Life Outside the Rat Race. However, all of my lists here will be the Top ____ of ______. Lists are easy on the eyes and the brain. I think if we broke more things up into lists people would read more. Hell, look at 90% of newspaper stories - paragraphs are often 1-2 sentences. So I'm going with it.

Top 5 things impractical things I would buy if I won the lottery: (in no particular order)
1. wine cellar
2. collection of full size arcade games
3. an airplane
4. private movie theater
5. L.A. Galaxy


Top 3 people that are dead to me:
1. Mel Gibson
2. most of my high school friends
3. Steve Guttenberg

Top 7 favorite childhood toys:
1. Optimus Prime
2. G.I. Joe hovercraft with depth charges
3. Hippity-Hop
4. Tutti Fruity (stuffed animal - shut up Pete, I know what you're thinking)
5. Richard Scarry Busytown playset
6. O.G. Nintendo
7. Construx

Top 8 favorite beers
1. Guinness
2. Murphy's
3. Sierra Nevada Pale
4. Kona Fire Rock
5. Newcastle
6. SLO Brewing Co Blueberry Wheat
7. Kostritzer
8. Tetley's


Top 4 Cold War propaganda movies
1. Red Dawn
2. Rocky 4
3. War Games
4. Iron Eagle

Top 1 movie that convinced me that if was good enough at video games I would get recruited by either the military, pro sports teams, or some secret space rebel army:
1. The Last Starfighter

I shall be released

I think If I'd have been born in the 40's I would have been a Rock Star in the 60's. It all might have ended in tragedy.

I am now listening to two versions of the same song. It's called "I shall be released" I'm listening to the version by The Band and also by Bob Dylan.

Welcome Jeff, now make with the funny.

ipod top 5

I'm not really a big ipod listener and only just recently did it get updated on itunes. But i still enjoy these 5 faves:
1. Good-Better Than Ezra
2. More Than a Feeling-Boston
3. Ordinary World-Duran Duran
4. Don't Stop Believin'-Journey
5. Take a Picture-Filter

A little help from my friends!

So i need/want a new full time job. My skills are as follows: i'm awesome, hard working, smart and will do anything if the money is right. If any of you have some information, i'd appreciate it.

Movie Night is Back Motherfuckers

Its time for another Movie night motherfuckers! For real this time. I know the spaghetti western night fell through, but this one is for real, so long as the demand is high enough. Here is the movie, are you ready for it?

Big Trouble in Little China

Yes, possibly the greatest 80's movie. It's Kurt Russell, a young Kim Catrall and director John Carpenter at their very best. If we can make this happen, we'll do a chinese buffet, and Tsingtao beer. RSVP your interest level and we'll pick a Saturday night.

Here are a few lines from the movie to wet your appetite:

"Now you listen to the old Pork Chop express on a Dark and stormy night..."

"Wise man has enough sense to get in out of the rain!"

"if I'm not back in an hour...call the president."

"Son of a Bitch must pay!"

"This does what, exactly?
Huge Buzz!"

"great! 6 demon bag, terrific! what's in it?!"