I'm bored!

I think there should be a new thing where people don't go to work between Christmas and New Year's. I'm seriously just sitting at my desk doing nothing. I come in at 8:30am and get my coffee and sit at my desk checking the internet and while doing this i am fully aware that my staff in the other room is also just sitting there and they are waiting for me to give them something to do. Well i got nothing for them or myself to do all week! So what do i do? I can only fake being busy for so long. I got 8 hours of faking to fill. All machines have been cleaned. Rooms have been cleaned. Paperwork is done. Any ideas?? I guess i'll go onto myspace.com and continue to search for people from back in the day to see if they have a page. Or there's always solitaire. *sigh*

The Year of Change

In this year old post, Lauri predicted that 2006 would be the year of change. I think she has been proven right, not only for herself but for a lot of you out there. Lets see if I can highlight some of the life changing stuff that happened over the course of the last year. i'll start with Lauri since it was her post. She wanted to get a new cheaper apartment, which she managed to do with the help of a new, awesome, roomate/ live in lover (lovah!). She wanted a new job, well she was offered a new job, but decided to turn it down because of the huge raise she got at her current job. Well done Lauri with making things happen. As for myself, I finished all my classes at Cal Poly finally and went from working part-time to being a dept. head over the course of the year. I finally moved back out of my parents house and got a new apartment with Lauri and I paid off my truck.
Aside from Lauri and me there have been a bunch of reisdence changes this year, lets see if I can remember them(I'm not including those of you that got married this year, you'll get your turn): Tim moved out of 511 and in with Bima. Tom moved down to...I don't even know what city that is, Alhambra? San Gabriel? Shiela ended up moving in with her sister in texas and then got a house of her own. Alex moved to Alaska. Our Welsh blogger Owen got an office job and then quit the office job, I'm sure causing several residential shifts.
Then there were the marriages: Amanda and Jeff, Melanie and Aaron, Bree and Ruben, Ed and Amy, who did I miss?

Yep, the year of change. I wonder what will 2007 bring? Will it be more of the same or more changes? I don't know but I'm looking forward to finding out.

I little Douglas Adams for you

"Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so."

Peter's brand

Just the other day we were sitting around the office talking about the beers we liked. I mentioned that the worst beer I ever tasted was a beer that had my name on it. Its that "Peter's Brand" shit that they sell at Trader Joe's, it friggin awful. So today one of the sales managers was really nice and bought me a couple of 6 packs for Christmas (she was not privy to the previous conversation) What was one of the six packs? Peter's Brand. (she was being clever and thoughtful and I appreciate it.) As I looked at that six pack, I thought to myself, how can this beer be as bad as i remember, is there any such thing as a "bad beer". Well I just cracked open the first of the six pack, and good god is it bad! It tastes like a normal beer that some scraped across their asshole before putting the bottle cap on. I think I will bring a class action suit for all the Peters in the wortld whose name this beer defames.

Beatles Rising

"Don't let me Down!"
For some reason this Beatles refrain became suddenly extremely relevant to me, one night when it was played on the George Nauri show on KFI. (Its what I fall asleep to.) I had the CD already but for some reason had not put it onto my iTunes yet. Strange how songs move in and out of your life, having relevance at certain times and falling into obscurity at others. I won't psychoanalyze myself as to why this song is suddenly important, but it certainly doesn't have anything to do with you fine people. MERRY CHRISTMAS, (Happy ch-iz-anikah to all you jewish mothahfuckas) I hope you all come by the parents house at some time on christmas eve for some Big Sandwich, eggnog, bloody mary's, beer or whatevers your poison.

Update on the Alaskan Asassin

Well I'm still up here this marks the longest time I've been in alaska with my parents. I'm still unemployed which pisses me and my parents off (Mostly MOM). But anyways I fill out applications and these are the responses I get : 1. A grocery store called Nichols The guy who was in charge of hiring told me "at church" that he would call me that week ... that was 2 weeks ago. 2. The community medical center would've been a great job with a good salary and benefits. I actually went to an interview at this one and I thought the interview went pretty well but I was wrong I got the call today said they were going to get someone else. But they said they were going to keep my application for "special jobs" I don't know what the hell that means. I need a job right now. It also threw a wrench in my plan to visit all you guys. I miss all you so much and I don't care if I'm being mooshy. Also it's been snowing for almost a week mixing with rain and it's supposed to snow through christmas which looks pretty but I have to shovel which sound easy but it starts to hurt. So you see I haven't blogged becuase nothing exciting has happened. My parents just did our (me and Randy) christmas shopping on tuesday... which means it will not be there christmas day aside from a couple presents. I need an xbox 360 and I doubt they are getting me one but who knows. Sometimes I think my life is a tv show and it's a wierd one at that. Actually I found a little something exciting on a wrestling website. TNA Wrestling which is the second popular wrestling aside from WWE is accepting resumes for interns during the summer and spring. I have to look into that. Last but not least bad news I have to go back to school. I came up here after they said I wouldn't have to go back to school. It's for an AA degree which I don't think it will help me. Especially getting it from a college where the head is an aunt who gossips. I swear that college is horrible when you are 4 points away from a B in a class and they give you a C because you didn't try to be a friend to them. I can't be a friend to a 40 year old woman teacher. I hope this situation changes quickly for the better. Like have a single girl my age show up. Well I guess that's all I can say about that. Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year Everybody!!!!!!

Christmas??!!!

Holy shit i can't believe its almost Christmas! I haven't even finished my shopping yet. I just started on Tuesday so i guess its all my fault. But i've been busy. I went to Texas to visit the family. It was freaking cold there! I took pictures of icicles on the plants it was so cold. I can't say i've ever seen actual icicles, it was weird. Then i came back for less than a week to work my ass off at work so that one of the managers could go to India for like a month. After all that work i went to Vegas! Pete and I lost our asses off. Oh! and if you were one of the ones who got drunk texted, we apoligize. We were in our room drinking till we couldn't feel feelings anymore and we wanted all of you to be there with us. So now there's nothing to look forward to till summertime. I think starting in the new year everyone should blog once a week. Just once a week is all. I think i can come up with something, you? Well i just wanted to say hi and i'm sure i'll see you all this weekend. later!

Happy Birthday Lauri

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LAURI
I Love You!

BOATFEST 06

Don't sink the ship rally. This rally will be held on Dec. 23rd at 3:00

Clerks II

Funniest Line from "Clerks II":
"There's only one return and it aint of the king, its of the Jedi.."

I Miss My Moes

Alex has moved to Alaska and Randy is on business in Ft. Wayne. What the hell am I supposed to do? Hang out with my girlfriend? Fuck that!

I think you might dig this...

Hey Guys, i dont know if news of this monumental development in the history of our species made it to you, but i think you people should know. In Britain every 10 years the government conducts a census of the population (all a bit 1984 no?). One of the questions that is asked is 'what is your religon?'. during the last census in 2001, someone suggested putting down 'Jedi' in answer to this. well the idea spread, no doubt on the internet, and the reults are in- 390,000 british citizens are claiming Jedi as their religon, and there is now a campaign to get it recognised as an official religon. if it is, it will be the 4th largest in the UK! Two Jedi Knights have been on Sky News (our equivalent to Fox News), to pitch the case, then a 'representative' of the Jedi's had a debate with a religious commentator on why it should be officially recognised- and did quite well. does this mean that soon i'll be able to take George Lucas's birthday off as a holy day? i hope so, after all it's no more ridiculous than basing an entire belief system on a book written 2000 years ago, that was written at least a generation after then main characters had died, and has been changed many times since. These are not the Gods you're looking for.

What about that tower!?

Bye Alex!

Good Luck and Keep in Touch! :)

Here are some more choice pics from last night

Owen, In honor of your life changing decision, I give you this, taken last night at the Crown. I corrected for the flash as best I could, but it was the only way to get a decent shot. Didn't come out to bad though. Enjoy.

Embrace the chaos!

So after my six months in an office things finally came to their logical conclusion. my manager (who is an obsessive compulsive, analy retentive control freak) took me off to a side room and told me that i was "undermining the organisation" and that i should stop criticising the managment, or leave. So i'm leaving, and going to work at an alternative education/ sustianable living centre, to organise carnivals and chop wood and stuff. Dont quite know how things are going to work out financially but i've decided that i have to do what makes me happy first and worry about the numbers later. i might burn some shirts in a symbolic goodbye to the ratrace, then get a big tattoo on my face.

"...El Duderino, if your not into the whole brevity thing"

Alex is going far far away

If you haven't heard yet, Alex is moving up to Alaska. Yes thats right, Alaska. Gonna try his hand at hunting Grizzlies. And he says he's gonna bag 30 crows.
Anyway, he leaves on the 16th so we're gonn have a little going away shindig for him at the Crown on the 11th. I hope you can all make it out that night. Its a saturday so you should have no excuse. See you there.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Scared? You will be...You Will be.

AV5 is Back!

For those interested parties who remember old posts, here's an update. AV5 is back up in the House this week. Einstien Hair, pants 5 sizes too big, oversized glasses, and, of course, suspenders.

Hollywood Styleez

So I just finished watching the remake of "The Omen" on DVD. I know your first question is "Why?" I don't know, all I can say is I didn't rent it, I borrowed it from someone who did. Of course, it was a piece of crap, but at least Hollywood is staying true to its values, because even in a reamake of a 30 year old horror movie they didn't forget to do one thing...add a car chase. Because what does every hollywood movie have to have regardles of context or time period? Of course a car chase. Gone are the days of gratuitous violence and unnecessary nudity, arrived are the days of the car chase. Blaring sirens, the shot of the gear shift being jammed into place are all requisitely present in this fine example of Hollywood movie making. I was an hour and 45min into this thing and asking myself how they were going to work in the car chase? All I can say is Bravo. Bravo.

Some Pics of the New Digs

Wedding in Mexico...not so smooth

So…I narrowly escaped Mexico. Long story, but I’ll give you an abridged version. Let’s just start by saying imagine things that you wouldn’t want to happen at your wedding, well they did plus some. First we arrive in Rosarito to find a Mexican carnival (this is a high point in the trip). WE rode the bumper cars (awesome), and then traveled on down to Ensenada. Met some folks at Papas & Beer, drank some, had some fun, went back to the hotel, slept. Next day (wedding day), hung out at Tim’s new favorite hangout Los Amigos, drank more beer went back to the hotel to prepare for the wedding. Doesn’t sound bad at all, does it? Just wait. Blah blah blah ceremony, cocktail hour, with apps. including civiche (this will come up later). Reception starts, had some shots, some food, some dancing. Everyone is drinking having a good old time. Here’s where it all goes downhill. I look over from chatting with some guests to see JC beating someone down, yes there was a fist fight at the wedding. Then next to me there is a continuation of the same fight, but with different people (no fists were thrown), which I had to jump in the middle of and stop. As if this is not bad enough, it gets worse. After the fight I found Bree crying, when I told her that it would be ok, she turned to me and yelled (in a very mean and bitchy tone) IT IS NOT OK, IT IS MY WEDDING, so I of course turned around and went to get another drink, I couldn’t deal with a yelling crying bride. So we leave (actually I think that we were all kicked out, nothing ruins a wedding like a fist fight). So we leave, and getting into a cab, JC proceeds to slam my hand in the cab door, ouch! Except I was so trashed I didn’t feel anything. Booze is like magic. Next morning, I feel like SHIT. I wanted to die. And, I realize that I have lost my sunglasses. We all gather in the hotel room and find out the almost everyone came back form the wedding with the shits. The civiche made everyone sick. Thank God I didn’t eat any, because I’m sure that the only thing that would make my life worse at that point would have been to have both a raging hangover, and the shits. Time to leave, but we weren’t able to just yet, because at this point it has become apparent that the car keys have been lost. JC & Richard head off to see if they can find the keys at the wedding venue, no luck, so they head off to find a locksmith, who they bring back to the hotel so he can take apart the car and make a new key from the ignition. Finally, the new key is made, and we’re off.

Final Tally
Fist fight at wedding: 1
Near fist fight at wedding: 1
Lost pair of sunglasses: 1
Lost car key: 1
Crying bride: 1
Angry groom: 1
Hand slammed in cab door: 1
People who got food poisoning from food at wedding: 12 (that I know of)

Lesson I learned: DO NOT get married in Mexico

Friday the 13th Curse

So maybe it wasn't a wise decision to do what i did on Friday the 13th, but i did it anyways. I did what everyone dreads doing at work. I asked my boss for a raise. How did it go, you ask? Not to well. I was belittled and made fun of. So why didn't i storm out and quit right there and then? Well i just had enough courage to ask for the raise. I didn't plan what i would do afterwards. Pretty much my boss is an ass. I always try to give him the benefit of the doubt but inevitable he does just what i think he'll do, be an asshole. He compared me to, and i quote, "joe shmoe of the street". He in not so many words, said that i was making what i was making cuz i don't do anything special around here. Am i overreacting? Did he really say that? yes he did. i wish i was overreacting. Then he decided it would be funny or something to ask me how long i'd been wanting to ask him for more money. I said a day. which is true when it really comes down to it but he got a big grin on his face and said, "no, really?" So now i'm being made fun of. Just great! He asked how much i wanted to be making to put a smile on my face. i told him, " $$$$$$,000 would put a smile on my face and get me to come into work everyday for another year." I'm also supposed to put together something of a proposal as to what responsibilities i can add to to make this raise justifiable. How about i kept coming to this god forsaken place for over 7 years as being justifiable. Well needless to say i'm a bit hurt and disappointed that i didn't get the respect i think i deserve. So am i gonna do the proposal thing? I don't know, i have a month to think about it. Am i gonna put my resume out there? I think this just might be the straw that broke the camels back. Thanks for listening/reading and here's a bit of advice. Don't ask for raises and don't do it on Friday the 13th.

Pete is a Dick

Here's something:
So the other night I was at Paco's in Arcadia with Randy enjoying muchas cervezas and tacos especiales. Inevitably I had to use the restroom to relinquish what I had just paid $4 a bottle for. Lo and behold the most disturbing bathroom graffitti I had ever seen. The epithet read "Pete is a Dick" and right next to it, a crudely drawn form of a woman spread eagle with "Pete" and an arrow pointing southwards. I wondered who is this Pete who had so angered someone enough to scratch into a wall in the men's room at Paco's. And then it hit me, this could be me. I mean really, how many Pete's do you know? and how many of those love Paco's as much as I do. Did I wrong some one with out knowing it? I can't imagine I have but maybe it was inadvertant. Then there is the other question is this Pete a dick or is he a pussy? I mean the writing on the wall will tell you he's a dick, but the drawing will tell you different.
Anyway, if that message was meant for me then I apologize to whoever I wronged. Let me buy you a beer, at least we can agree we both love Paco's

We all suck

This place is a blogging desert...where has everyone gone. We didn't all go out an get real jobs, did we? SO what's new in my life?...Nothing, nothing at all. I'm in the process of organizing a beer pong tournament, which after Joe got his greedy little planning hands on has (surprise!) gone to shit. Other than that I leave on Friday for a festive wedding in Mexico, Yippie! I'm going to get drunk! I love weddings. I'll be back hopefully with some fun drunken wedding stories to share.

Cell Phones

The most insidious device ever invented by man is the cell phone. All my suspisions and fears about carrying a cell phone have come true. Let me describe what happened yesterday on two different occasions throughout the day. I sat down at my desk to check a voicemail on my land line, as I was listening, someone was trying to ring through, also at the same time, my cell phone was ringing and it was work related. Why would you call someone's cell phone during normal business hours when they have a phone line? I'll tell you why, we have become a culture of instant gratification. Whenever some little thought or need pops into our heads, we start to freak out if we can't communicate it immeadiately. Look what I'm doing now! I could have waited til I saw all of you to spew this little rant, but now that not fazt enough, I have to get it out there! How about this little scenario, you're meeting with a client and all of a sudden another client is ringing through on your celly, ahhhhh what to do! If I ignore the call the client I'm with will think that I ignore calls from clients, if I answer it, I'm just that dick that answers his phone in the middle of conversations. You can't win and thats the way THEY want it. Insidious I tell you.

How to Make a good Latte'

I'm posting this because for two days in a row now at 2 different coffee places I've gotten crappy Latte's. And its the reason I moved to regular drip coffee for the most part. But Dammit, sometimes a man needs a Latte.

First, get your espresso shot ready to pour but steam your milk first! get the milk nice and warm and then start making your foam by holding the steam tip just under the surface of the the milk and gently moving it up and down. Not too much foam, if your making one latte, a half inch layer of foam is plenty. Watch your thermometer! Once the milk gets to 139-140 degrees, SHUT THE STEAM OFF! Once the steam is off the temp will continue to rise to 145 degrees. Now, this is complicated, start your shot pouring and get the milk pitcher and tamp it down on the counter a few times. This will burst any big bubbles in the foam and will make it stiff and managable. Pour your shot in your cup first, (if you do it the other way around, you have a machiatto) and pour your milk into the cup, using a spoon to hold back the foam. (Remember, a shot of espresso and a bunch of foam is a cappuccino NOT a latte.) once the cup is about 3/4 full with milk and coffee stop pouring and use the spoon to push in the nice stiff foam. DO NOT just remove the spoon and continue to pour. A good latte should have a head of foam about the size of a good head on a beer. Some people like it flat (no foam) I guess thats okay. Having it with non-fat milk is not, the foam sucks, and only accomplished master baristas like myself can get a good head of foam from non-fat milk.

Things to watch out for.
Don't burn the milk. A pitcher of milk can be steamed once and only once. As soon as you try to reheat an already heated and steamed pitcher of milk, the temperature will jump up too fast and you'll have burnt milk before you know it. (this is whats happened the last two times I went to the Starbucks on Colorado and Los Robles) When you're at Starbucks and you hear the milk steaming...if it sounds really deep and hollow...the barista has burnt the milk and you're in for a crappy drink.
Feel the weight. A good latte, should have the heft of a full cup of drip coffee. If the cup feels too light, you've gotten a lazy barista and its probably a cappuccino. (This is what happened at Gelsons this morning.)

The funny thing is that I worked at Starbucks, but I didn't learn how to make proper espresso drinks there. I was taught by old school masters when I worked for a company called Old Pacific Coffee. They used to have a coffee cart at the conference center, but now they're based in Temecula. Those dudes knew how to make coffee.

Traveling at the Speed of Light

For those involved in last night's discussion and still give a shit, here's a quote from A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking:

"As an object approaches the speed of light, its mass rises ever more quickly, so it takes more and more energy to speed it up further. It can in fact never reach the speed of light, because by then its mass would have become infinite, and by the equivalence of mass and energy, it would have taken an infinite amount of energy to get it there. For this reason, any normal object is forever confined by relativity to move at speeds slower than the speed of light."

Sunsets...

More Camping

Yes. That is a Cheeze-it and Mayonaise Sandwich....

Camping Pictures

MovieStar At D&B

Yes there is a movie star at Dave and Buster's where I work at. He actually works there at Dave and Buster's. He's an up and coming movie star and soon will be known throughout the world. If you don't know it's me!!!! ALEXANDER "HOLLYWOOD" MOOOOOEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yup my new movie Accepted came out and my word of mouth have made it spread throughout Dave and Buster's like wildfire. Every day i come in I hear from another person saying Hey I saw you in your movie. It's a great feeling. I will probably get more better ones soon. About I've counted about 15 people that have said they saw me. Two of the managers are calling me Hollywood (at my request) but they still do it. Even some of the cooks are recognizing me from the movie and saying they saw me too. I didn't even say anything or had a name in this movie. Just imagine when I will have that. Yeah!!!!! Well I already saw Accepted and hopefully will see it again. Cuz I want everyone to see me and just Cuz That's How I Roll! So if you want to see a good movie and me then watch Accepted! Well let me end this post with a quote I made myself : "Life is a MOVIE and I'm the STAR!!!"

The below pics are all out of order. The last ones are from the first day and so on up. Enjoy.

For those in the know, I will say only this about this nature boy pic. "They drew first blood, not me!" Also, "if your going to send that many men against (Pete D.) you better remember one thing...a good supply of body bags."

Seeing the Sequoia's in there natural habitat on this hike was incredible. Here are three young trees. And by young I mean they probably started growing the same time as the battle of Hastings (1066 A.D. for you non English Majors or right around the time all of Owen's poeple started speaking French). The sad part about taking their picture is that you can never get the whole tree into the frame.

This is King's Canyon looking Down the King's river. King's Canyon is Awesome and it reminds me of Yosemite Valley. But why do I look so happy in this pic?
1. I just turned 30
2. Only the bugs have lease in Kings Canyon in August. We spent the whole day swatting bugs of every kind on this hike.

See below to find where this sign led us.

This is the Lovely toilet facility that the previous sign led us to. Lauri found it much more comfortable and less risk of tetanus to squat in the bushes nearby. But what can you expect at nearly 10,000 feet.

This is Lauri near the top of one of the most spectacular trails I've ever hiked.

I'm at home right now, and all the pictures from San Clemente (and there are some good ones are on Lauri's computer so you'll have to wait til tommorow for those. But for today here are some choice pics from out trip to Sequoia.














This is Lauri at the top of Moro Rock. It's got views like Half Dome, except you can drive right up to it, walk ten minutes, and you're at the top.














Some bitchy lady asked us to take a picute of their family, I volunteered Lauri, then they told her that it might be on their Christmas card. No pressure there! Anyway, they took a picture of us in return. I forgot to take of my sunglasses. This was at the General Sherman tree, which although is supposedly the largest tree in the park, it is not nearly as impressive as seeing them not surrounded by tourists and asphalt and is also not nearly as impressive as me and Lauri and so is not pictured here.

Once again, blogger is not cooperating with me as I try to post these pics, so I think I'll do them one by one from now on.

May the force be with you

I just wanted to give a happy birthday shot out to my boy Pete.

Munci Bach Droog

Hey Dudes and Dudettes, hope all is well with camping, and i hope the surf doesn't suck for those of you who can pry themselves out of their camp chairs. i'm staging a slightly more lonley (and colder) camping trip in Britain next week- got three weeks off work so i'm gonna get my tent and my board and go wondering. have a coors light for me (and a tequila, and a pipe, and a vicoden).

Jerks!

You are all jerks, I know that right now you're having a jolly ol'time setting up your little camping site, and having happy hour. Laughing playing sorry. Simply enjoying yourselves, while I am at work. You guys suck!

The African Black Rhino may be extinct. Pass on the Sad News.

The Long Dark Tea Time of the Soul

In his book Life, the Universe, and Everything Douglas Adams describes Sunday afternoons in this way, “That terrible listlessness that starts to set in at 2:55pm, when you know you’ve taken all the baths you can usefully take that day, that however hard you stare at any given paragraph in the newspaper you will never actually read it or use the revolutionary new pruning technique it describes, and that as you stare at the clock, the hands will move relentlessly on to four, and you will enter the long dark teatime of the soul.”
For me, the long dark tea time of the soul has, for a long time now, been a Sunday afternoon reality. Anytime I find myself with a Sunday off and Monday back at work, I dread Sunday afternoons. I get stressed out on Sundays. I find that as Sunday afternoon hits, I get restless as I think about how badly I’ve wasted the weekend and how the week ahead is going to suck because of it. Whether it was the term paper I was supposed to write, or the errands I was supposed to run, it all starts to pile up like “loose ends tying a noose in the back of my mind” (Beck). By 3 o’clock Sunday afternoon, I’ve watched all the TV I can possibly watch in a weekend and my mind just won’t concentrate on whatever is on. I start to get the urge to go out, but know that doing so will only cause suffering the next morning. So I sit and stare at the TV, not really watching anything, and my foot starts to violently twitch as the nervous energy starts to build up. I pace around and try to figure out what’s really making me all anxious, so I can maybe do something about it, but its never something specific, is it? Its either too late and you’ll just have to now consider the consequences or its just those thousand little things that on their own wouldn’t bother you, but taken together, keep you from enjoying The Simpsons.
I’ve long since given up trying to get a good night sleep on Sunday nights. With all the shit that builds up on Sunday night coupled having invariably slept in on Sunday morning I always just stare at the ceiling hoping that I fall asleep before 3am so I can at least get two hours sleep. I just figure that Monday morning is going to suck and I’ll be back in the swing by Tuesday morning.
The fucked up thing is that I know the solution to this little problem. I just have to not leave loose ends hanging on Friday and I need to get more exercise on the weekends so I’m more worn out on Sunday afternoons. And don’t think that I don’t make a pledge to do just that every time the long dark tea time of the soul rears its ugly head. But then Friday morning rolls through and you start to think about how hard you’ve worked all week and how no one works on Friday afternoon anyway and that you’ve earned a few beers…and there it is, and it all falls apart.
So here I am, deeply entrenched in the long dark tea time of the soul, stressing over the tiny crap that builds up, knowing that none of it is going to be as bad as it seems. Nevertheless, it almost midnight now and I have to be up at 5am. The scary thing about all this is that the quote I started out with is from a passage about how Sunday afternoons and the long dark tea time of the soul drove an immortal being mad.
So here's to hoping I'm not going mad.

A brief foray into the Rat Race

It is from this humble cubicle that I run the daily operations of my humble convention center. Some features of my cubicle: to the left of my monitor is my tower, taped to which is a picture of yoda and a speech bubble, remiding me that "anger, fear, aggression, the dark side of the force are they..." just below that is a quote from the Old English poem "The Wanderer" reminding me that "wisdom is slow and comes but late. There are pictures of a sunset from camping and a group picture of us at the tracks. Now all of you out there share your work space with the group.

Return of the gangsta

To all my little camping hoes, i ain't rich bitch!

ha ha ha...

Is it wrong that i think, hope, and pray that this company will go under cuz i'm gone for two weeks?? Cuz i think it might. hee hee hee.... Its Thursday and i there are only 4 more working days to get things done and it ain't happening. It definately puts a smile on my face while walking down the halls here. to be continued......

Hump Day

Anyone up for happy hour at the Crown tonight??

What is this world coming to?

So... I'm back, and how you ask? Well, my boss took a meeting in Long beach, so I either spend the afternoon on the internet, or sleep at my desk, not so fun, I've already tried. Lauri's post filled with camping stuff made me think. So, I'm planning on coming down to hang out for some camping this year. I'm not so much of a camper, but I've been told that it's mostly wake up, drink, sit on the beach, drink, sit by a fire, drink, play clue & sorry and drink. That I'm totally up for.
Oh, what is this world coming to I ask, well I was at target the other day, I heard Lauri's voice in my head say something about sorry and camping, so I ventured over to the game section, and guess what? They didn't have hungry hungry hippos (a personal favorite) or Trouble (another of my favorites). I was going t buy them for camping. What the F! No trouble or hungry hungry hippos (from here on out to be refered to as H3). Taget is my go to place, they have so much that I need and even more that I do not need but find myself purchasing anyway. And yet when I go looking for something important like H3 and trouble they don't have them. I am disappointed!

I can't wait........

..to go on VACATION!!! Who's ready? huh? Cuz i sure am! Only 8 more days to go and i'm outta here. I've been checking weather.com for our beach temps and i think we're looking good guys. I'm of course expecting the morning cloudiness but i'm hoping for some great stars which i think we all don't look enough at while we're there. One bummer is that the days are getting shorter. I hate rushing to make dinner to go down to the tracks. Well we'll see how it goes. We're gonna have a keg this year in the big green tent! I think the people around us are gonna wonder why in the world so many people keep going in and out of this green tent. Its gonna be so relaxing though. Then Pete and i are gonna go to Sequoia right after that! I've never been to Sequoia but if its even close to what Yosemite is, i can't wait. I think this will be the longest vacation time i've taken. Almost two weeks! Coming back to work is gonna suck. But for now i'm excited. I'm training this guy at work so that when i'm gone he can do a few things. I'm half ass training him cuz he can't be trusted with certain mfg information. Then i need to make sure that i'm off at the Civic too. That might be a bit tricky but i think Pete covered it all for us.

Speaking of the Civic. I haven't talked about how its been working there since i got the new position. Its ok. Its kinda what i thought it would be but kinda not. I think that's how it is with all jobs though. I started out working some shifts with Pete. Which was great cuz we were hanging out together and i was getting paid to do it. i was also learning a lot from him about the job, things i didn't know. Then our shifts changed around a bit and i was working and he wasn't, i hate that! Not only that but i was learning things from co-workers that didn't mesh with Pete's taining. I got lazy and not confident in myself. I don't work again till Sat. so hopefully i can get back on track over there.

At this job things have been a bit tense. The girl who worked up in the front office left abruptly and pissed off her supervisor, Jennifer. Now i came to be kinda friends with this girl (she's the one who got pregnant earlier in the year, i think you all know that story) and we would talk now and again up in the front office. Well Jennifer didn't like that cuz she's got some weird thing about how i talk to certain people and not to her. It comes down to her being crazy. So when the girl told Jennifer it was her last week Jennifer freaked out all of a sudden and they barely spoke for the rest of the week until Thursday came around. Thursday i decieded not to go to work so i missed the whole thing. I got all the gossip on Friday so this info is like third hand stuff. But i guess Jennifer yelled and kinda cursed at her and then she freaked out and ran up to my boss's car, who was just driving in, and said she was leaving today. Then some meetings took place and she got a bad deal here. She ended up leaving at about 10am on thursday. The party on Friday was cancelled and somehow my name was thrown in a couple of times. How i got involved is just Jennifer being crazy. I know the story got a bit short at the end there but i can't type all that happened. Not to mention Pete would make fun of me. Enough about that though, i got something else to say now... Have any of you seen that show on Discovery call Dirty Jobs? Oh my God i love that show! He's hilarious. He reminds me a bit of my uncle who lives in SD and he also reminds me of a Simpons character. He's funny and the people who's jobs he goes to are funny. Its just a great show. Check it out sometime. I watched the same episode back to back last night cuz it was so good.

Well i hope no one says i don't blog cuz i just wrote a novel. I need some more coffee (which explains the ranting here, coffee schkeming) and then i guess i'll see what the six people who work for me are up to. I'm sure i'll see you all this weekend sometime. Have a great day!

Selling Out to the Man

The rumors and text messages are true. I have finally sold my soul to the devil and got a cell phone. My job is paying most of the bill so I'm not too upset. I didn't even put up a fight, and go on some tirade to Human Resources on the soul stripping foulness of cell phones. (I had already gone on a tirade about used/unused PTO, so I didn't want to push my luck.) I actually like the phone I got, its covered in black rubber, so I don't mind banging it around. Its also got the same interface as Randy's so I'm familiar with how to use it. I got the unlimited text messaging, so expect plenty of drunk text messages to come your way. obviously I can't give you the number here, but if you call Lauri, she'll give it to you.

Landis Cheats

Floyd Landis is a cheater

Thank you "Floyd" Landis, (what a retarded name, no one named Floyd has ever done anything good in this world...except Pink Floyd. and Floyd the Barber) for embarassing your entire country. You Fucking cheater! As if the United States doesn't have enough problems right now, do our athletes really have to embarass us in front of the entire world by cheating...IN A BIKE RACE?
Message to Floyd Landis: Move to East Germany you shrunken balled bitch! We don't want your cheating ass back.

FUCK MSN AND MSNBC!!

I've just removed www.msn.com as the home page of my computer an will never check msn or msnbc.com again. Why? because they ran a headline that says "Current Events: Sign of End Times?" How could a serious news organization be so irresponsible as to run such a hysteria induced headline? PLEASE, don't run a serious analysis of world events, that would just be too informative and balanced. You crazy fucks, is attention that important to you? You've lost all integrity. I feel like saying more, but will just say this...FUCK MSN AND MSNBC!!!!!

Regular Out of State Reader

Through the magic of Site Meter, I have determined that we have a regular reader in Longview Washington. I would like you to introduce yourself to the group. Let us know what you're all about. I'm glad you like the blog.

The Simpsons

To Make up for my previous miss on a Simpson's quote, let me offer this little exchange:

Homer: Could Jesus microwave a burrito so hot that even he couldn't eat it?
Flanders: He could but then...Well, as melon scratchers go, thats a Honeydew.
Homer: Now you know what I've been going through...

HUGE NEWS!

Owen "Red Dragon" Griffiths FINALLY has his name on the wall of the Crown City Brewery! I'm sure by this point he had given it up as an elaborate scam to bilk him out of $400. But the dream finally a reality. Pictures, are soon to follow.

A rare appearance

So...here I am. I know that I am more of blog reader and blog comment maker, but why not participate? Why not provide some boring dribble about the not so exciting life of mine. I have realized that often my contributions are angry, but this will not be so. Or, will it? Hmmm...Just one complaint, it's too hot to function. Really, is this type of heat necessary? ok, I'm done now. So, I would like to defend myself by saying that I don't blog often becasue I spend most of my day doing one of the following: 1. busting my ass at work all day or 2. pretending to bust my ass, at which time I should squeeze in a little blog. But...while pretending, I can often get away with something quick (like a comment), but this situation does not provide for a long and tired rant (such as this). So, why today you ask. I don't know, today seems extra slow at my job. Is it that I am so efficient that there is nothing to do? Probably not. I wish that I brought a book. But, then we would all know that I'm not working. At least if I'm on the computer typing like a mad man everyone else just assumes that I'm working and doing something productive. HA! If they only new.

Fight the Power

Don't turn your Air conditioning down and don't conserve power. Use every drop of Juice you're hard earned money will pay for. Let Black this Mother Fucker Out and take few days off work. We need the break any damn way. Turns out the last "power crisis" was caused manufactured by Enron, so how can we trust those that say we are in a crisis.

The King of Beers

Ever Wonder?

Have you ever wondered if Jesus has already returned to the Earth, but got really into weed in high school, and is now just burnt out on some couch somewhere?

Because I do.

I feel the need to blog.

I'm not really sure what to talk about here. It just seems that the blog is lacking these days. My busy summer is starting to slow down a bit. There's just one more wedding to attend at the end of the month and then in August is camping. I'm taking lots of time off from work in August so that i can relax. First will be San Clemente then i think Pete and I are gonna try to go to Yosemite or something right after. Work is kinda weird right now. I have that new guy who is supposed to be my assistant and he sucks big time. I've already had to have a meeting with my crew cuz they weren't getting along with each other. So lame. Then at the Civic i got that new position. My first night in that position was last Saturday. It was the filming of the Last Comic Standing that aired last night. It was mayhem to say the least. I missed out on Amanda's bachlorette party (sorry Amanda). Then i work again this Saturday, so i'll be late to the Kegger Fest at Joe and Tim's. Their gonna start the construction at the Civic soon so i'll have to be the Event Supervisor of a big tent. Kinda like the circus. I'm not sure what else to really talk about. Oh i know! I've decided to not drink alcohol that much anymore. I don't like drunk Lauri. Now i'll totally get hammered at home but when out i'm limiting myself. And that's that. But what's cool is that i haven't craved any beer or anything lately. That always helps. Ok well i'm starting to bore myself here so i can only imagine your thoughts on this post. I'm sure i'll see you all around soon. :)

There's Beauty in the Breakdown

Okay so Maybe I wasn't actually on the verge of losing my mind, just really bored at work. And not the like, "Oh, I'm kinda bored today, I think I'll play some solitaire..." But more like the movie "Moment of realization" kind of bored. You know what I'm talking about. Here's how the scene would be shot: It's me sitting at my desk staring into my computer but not actually doing any work...(think Keanu Reeves in the Matrix right before Fed Ex delivers Morpheus' phone...) Cut to my face, a look of sorrow, a look of bewilderment, the glow of a blank computer screen reflects in my eyes. Slowly I look up, realizing that I can hear the flourescent lights buzzing. The buzzing is amplified for effect. I look over. In the cubicle next to me, the girl is shopping online for clothes. I look back forward, the buzzing of the lights is getting louder. Slowly, I begin breathing more and more heavily. Or maybe not, maybe its more subtle than that, maybe I just continue to stare straight ahead, but you know something is going on in my head. I slowly look over, there's my coat (For the puposes of this scene its winter) I stand up, I put my arms out and look around (think Jerry Maguire) I say nothing, grab my coat, and walk outside, suddenly the music comes up, Its the Shins New Slang. Now I'm on the sidewalk, hands in my coat pocket breathing steam and with an ever so slight grin on my face. Fade to black with the camera at my back as I walk into the distance. You know in your heart that I'm headed for a new life, outside this boring pointless rat race job. Roll Credits. It almost happened people I swear to god. Then I remembered I don't have one of those boring Rat Race type jobs. So instead of losing it, or walking out. I just went to Wahoos, got a couple of fish tacos and went back to work a little later when I would have something to do.

I saw "A Scanner Darkly" with Lauri the other night. I had an unfortunate movie experience earlier in the week and vowed to forsake theatres forever, but then decided I'd better get right back on the horse. I'll still never go back to the AMC Arcadia. EVER. Anyway, if you have a chance to see A Scanner Darkly...don't. What a let down. Its directed by the same guy that directed "Dazed and Confused" and its like, "what if I took those characters and put them in a old school Sci Fi Story. If you took out all the scenes when the characters are sitting around acting stoned, this movie is a half hour long...and better for it I might add.

I discovered a new Pink Floyd song that kicks ass. Its called "Wish You Were Here". It includes the line, if I'm hearing right, "do you think you can tell...a smile from a veil...". It is largely unencombered by the weirdness that renders most Pink Floyd songs unavailable for casual listening.

Jeff was trying to track me down today. Something about spreading rumors? Perhaps he's refering the the public urination incident, which did happen but is certainly nothing to be ashamed of. Or perhaps that was a mere pretense to get his hands on me for buying one too many Bushmill shots. I actually found it very hospitable of him not to turn any of them down, despite the verbal abuse and obscene gestures that followed each one. It was heartbreaking to see them go down the toilet. I guess they end up there one way or another its just a matter of time. It's not my fault, that dude can hold his liquor and I couldn't tell he was drunk. Thankfully, I don't carry a cell phone and am diabolically hard to get a hold of.

That's it you marvelously, magnificent sons of bitches.

I'm on the verge of a complete mental breakdown.

trees! with knees!

Thought i'd expand a little on my previous blog- the trees in question are sort of Lord of the rings type tree monsters made out of foam and cardboard with a hiking backpack attatched. So you get strapped in to the pack, then the bottom of the legs are attatched to your feet and you control the arms with wooden poles- I have a rehersal tomorrow, then the carnival is next saturday, I have to carry this thing for an hour through the streets, but i'll have a couple of stewards along side giving me water and stuff- apparently they've got the local buddist group to do the stewarding, and Hari Krishnas to lay on the food afterwards- lets put them in a jar and see if they fight!

Your Mother is a Terrorist Whore

This is what an Italian lip reader reported was said to Zidane to make him headbutt that dude, though both parties deny this is correct. Frankly, that comment would have me bust out laughing not make me headbutt someone. Imagine a Terrorist Whore, she could be her own weapon of mass destruction, spreading venerial disease to the Infidels.

Something New

So a couple of girls from work and i have decided to join Curves. (stop laughing) Its true. Its awesome too. Its not your average gym. This place makes you feel comfortable, maybe cuz its all women. Things you hear about Curves aren't really true. Its not a whole bunch of old fat women. Its average sized women and there are all ages there too. There are women there who are thinnner than i am working out. And then yes there are your handful of very big women too. But its fun there. Your not waiting for machines. Your not struggling with different weights. Your not confused as to how to use a certain machine. Its all women. The music is fun. And its a circuit workout, so i have to finish the whole workout. I can't convince myself to stop at Cruves. At a regular gym i'd just to do the treadmill then go home. That's no kind of workout. So go ahead and laugh at me if you want. I'm a Curves girl now!

Drunkedness and Metaphor

The sting of an over zealous vodka tonic cuts the meloncholy mood.

Yo! bumrush the show!

have 10 minutes- here goes- work is ok, everyone seems to like me and i pretend to like everyone else, and dont join in to much with the bitching, unless it's about managment 'cos then it's just standard office procedure right? have joined another band bringing me up to 3 1/2. the keyboardist is a complete drug freak but also a genius (he retired at the grand old age of 31!- apparently he kept on taking acid and his company kept on promoting him). the summer festival season is kicking off- I've been asked to dress as a giant tree and parade trough a town in a carnival type thing, followed by one of my bands taking to a wooden stage built in a forest- photo's will be forthcoming. thats all i've time for- hope I've entertained you for a moment there ratracers, ciao

To the Contributors of the Blog

Screw you guys.

Founding Fathers, Failed Directors and Inspiration from on High

Here's a special 4th of July post that will make it in just under the wire. I was watching Book TV this weekend, the author was Christpher Hitchins who wrote a recent book on Thomas Jefferson, and a revelation occured to me in which I could make a connection between the founding fathers and George Lucas. Bear (Bare?) with me here. Both George Lucas and the Founding father did several things with their lives, they made something great and then proceeded to do shitty things. Lets start with the founding fathers, they created The United States, with all its brilliant freedoms and seperations of power. The Declaration of Independence, The Constitution...documents of unrivaled brilliance. But the plain fact is that most of them were, individually not particularly nice, nor did they particularly believe the ideas contained in those documents. Just a few examples: It was said that George Washington was not a very friendly guy, very proper and snobbish as I understand it. John Adams, the famous failing of his presidency is the Sedition Act, under which it became against the law to criticize the government in the press or in public. A clear violation of the first ammendment which he helped write. Thomas Jefferson, not only a slave owner, but a man who had affairs with his slaves. Clearly, he did not feel all men were created equally.
Now we come to George Lucas, Star Wars the first trilogy...an act of cinematic brilliance. Nearly everything lucas is involved in after Return of the Jedi is complete garbage. (Some would argue that Jedi falls into this category, but I say it has redeeming qualities). Just think about it...Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom? ugh. He gets a pass for The Last Crusade, but we all know that Speilberg is the real Indy Mastermind. Then you come to the enhanced version of the original Star Wars trilogy in which two unforgivable mistakes are made: Greedo shooting first, and the alien musical number in Jedi. Then, of course, the new trilogy. You all know my feelings about the new trilogy so I won't go into it again here.
So i ask you. Is there such a thing as a muse, as the ancient greeks believed? Can the gods work through you pen and then abandon you for the rest of your mediorce life? Just something to chew on.

HAPPY 4th OF JULY!!!!!!

Return of the Gangsta

Who you gettin crazy Wit Ese'. Don't you know I'm Loco?

Bad news for the Emporer

Bad News for the Emporer

This is the funniest Robot Chicken Skit I've seen in a long time.

Again?!

I have baby birds again on my patio! Are they the same Doves? I'd like to think they are but i can't tell for sure. There are two eggs and they are very good parents. This time though they aren't in my plant, they're next to my plant. They expanded. So i can't wait to have two little babies again. The miracle of life, it's amazing!

My Hero

Remember when you were younger and people always asked you who you hero was. Everyone always has some standard bullshi answer "my mother, she endured 12 hours of labor" "my father he built our tree house in 4 hours and only said fuck 25 times." Crap like that. Well, I have found my hero and she walks among us, her name is Lauri... Whay you ask, well because she's badass. She can do it all!


As you can see she can take shots out of a penis shotglass, and in the same day fix a broken garbage disposal (the garbage disposal incident is another story in its own, for a later time people). This chick rocks!

Stanley Kubrick and the Mysterious Adam Baldwin

Let me just say that Stanley Kubrick only made three watchable films: "The Shining", "Dr. Strangelove" and "Full Metal Jacket". I know, I know, there are film scholars that will tell you that "2001" is the greatest movie ever made. Well I'll get on board if anyone of them can tell me what the fuck happens at the end of the movie. No one knows and no one can make sense of it. In the "poetics" Aristotle set up very simple rules as to what constitutes Literary art. One of those rules was that a story had to have a beginning, and end? As far as I can tell this movie breaks this quite simple convention. Now you can say what you will but if me and Aristotle got a chance to see this movie together we'd agree: "this thing is a piece of shit". BUT "Full Metal Jacket" has one of the est endings I've ever seen. It ends with a troop of Marines walking against the background of a burning city singing the theme song to the Mickey Mos Club. The meeting of soilder and boy have never been portrayed more clearly.
As it happens "Full Metal Jacket" has been on heavy rotation on HBO and I happened to catch the end of it tonight. I just realized that a dude named Adam Baldwin played the character Animal Mother in it. Who's Adam Baldwin you ask? Well he's not one of the Baldwin Brothers, but he was in the recently released movie "Serenity" a spin off of the TV show Firefly where he caught my attention as the most interesting character on the show. The funny thing is this: in Full Metal Jacket Adam Baldwin gets second billing, right between Matthew Modine and Vincent D'Nofrio. It got me thinking about the vagaries of hollywood so I looked him up on IMDB. Just to see what he'd been up to in the 20 year span from "Full Metal Jacket" to "Firefly" the answer: nothing. He's done bit parts in any little TV show that came around for like 15 years before he got a steady paycheck again. Just imagine : going from second billing on a Stanley Kubrick movie to being broke for years on end? Talk about a dream deferred. Hollywood is a cold land .